Saturday, October 26, 2013
The Simpsons – Secrets & Lies – Brian Manton
Friday, October 25, 2013
The Simpsons - Dim Light, Small City - Niel Jacoby
Homer: OH, I CAN'T TELL MARGE I GOT FIRED FROM THE PLANT, SHE'LL BE SO MAD.
Panel 2: Homer is walking past a sign on one of the buildings that says WRITERS WANTED, INQUIRE WITHIN.
Homer: I GOTTA FIND ANOTHER JOB!
Panel 3: Homer is doubling back to look at the sign, and in this panel we can see the name on the building: 21ST CENTURY FOX - SPRINGFIELD BRANCH.
Homer: HEY, I CAN WRITE! I THINK.
Panel 4: Homer is inside an office at 21st Century Fox Entertainment, and an executive is talking to him.
Exec: I'M SURE YOU CAME IN HERE WITH BIG DREAMS OF BEING A HOLLYWOOD BIG SHOT, BUT THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS HERE.
(LINK)
TELL ME, HOMER, HOW DO YOU THINK WE WRITE AN EPISODE OF THE STANFORDS?
Panel 5: Homer is thinking.
Homer: WELL, IF I HAD TO GUESS, I'D SAY THERE'S A BIG SLOT MACHINE, WITH CELEBRITIES AND CURRENT EVENTS FOR EACH PLOTLINE, AND YOU SPIN IT AND WRITE AN EPISODE AROUND THE RESULTS!
Panel 6: The exec is nervous, and is contacting security.
Executive(hushed): UH, SECURITY? LOCK ALL THE DOORS AND EXITS, HE KNOWS OUR SECRET.
Executive: SO, UH, HOW'D YOU LIKE A JOB WRITING FOR US?
Homer: I'D LOVE IT!
Thursday, October 24, 2013
The Simpsons - Radioactive Man Begins - J.D. Coughlan
Panel 1: A young child, 9 or 10, lying on the floor of a cave, having just fallen. The cave is lit only by some barrels marked with the "radioactive" symbol, giving off a faint glow. The child shields his eyes.
CAPTION: "What do you fear?"
Panel 2: A man, the now-adult Claude Kane from the first panel, stands shirtless in a dojo, surrounded by men in radiation-proof suits, preparing to attack. Kane wields two glowing green rods.
CAPTION: "If you devote yourself to an ideal..."
Panel 3: Close up of Kane's hand as he puts on his glove. Note that his entire costume should be "Nolanised."
CAPTION: "If you make yourself more than just a man..."
Panel 4: Close up of Kane snapping together his utility belt.
CAPTION: "...you become something else entirely..."
Panel 5: Large. We see Kane in his full Radioactive Man suit for the first time. He looks bold, but broody.
CAPTION: (Large) "A RADIOACTIVE MAN!"
Panel 6: Slim but wide panel. Radioactive Man's silhouette stands atop a building, lit by the "Radioactive signal" in the sky behind him.
CAPTION: Coming this summer: RADIOACTIVE MAN BEGINS.
END OF PAGE
The Simpsons – Family Matters – Shaun Richens.
The Simpsons - PSA - R.A. Wonsowski
Panel 1 - Ext. Springfield Power Plant. Our p.o.v. is on the ground, looking up at MR. BURNS and SMITHERS in the office balcony; MR. BURNS is addressing his employees. We are standing behind HOMER, LENNY, and CARL.
MR. BURNS: ...and so, to avoid Obamacare altogether, all full-time employees are hereby fired...
HOMER: D'oh!!
LENNY: You suck, Burns!
CARL: (to nearby coworkers) ...without the courtesy of a reach-around...
Panel 2 - same as Panel 1.
MR. BURNS: ...to be RE-hired to work TWO part-time shifts, beginning today...
HOMER: D'oh!!
LENNY: You suck, Burns!
CARL: (to CARL) ...wait, what?
OFF-PANEL: Has this happened to you?
Panel 3: same as above, but the crowd has turned to see, now foreground, TROY MCCLURE enter from the side.
TROY: Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such comedies as "Hot High School Ramadan" and the third season of the Simpsons.
TROY: And scenes like the one we see here are becoming even stupider, thanks to Obamacare.
Panel 4 - same as Panel 3, except TROY has been joined by charming waif, TIMMY.
TIMMY: Gee, Mr. McClure, how did the Affordable Health Care Act become such a debacle?
TROY: Well, Timmy, the complete hash of misunderstandings are the fault of one man at the White House...
Panel 5 - a smiling TROY MCCLURE holds up an 8 by 10 glossy of Press Secretary JAY CARNEY.
TROY: ...professional shill and presidential apologist, Jay Carney.
TROY: That's C-A-R-N-E-Y, the most punchable face in America!
Panel 6 - LENNY and CARL are holding down Press Secretary JAY CARNEY, now sporting a black eye and missing a tooth, while HOMER punches him in the stomach. TIMMY shakes grinning TROY's hand.
CARL: (smiling) Say, this is fun!
TIMMY: Gee, Mr. McClure, thanks!
TROY: No problem, Timmy. Now, go kill that messenger!
CAPTION: Paid for by Canadian Health Services and the British Medical Tourism Board.
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
The Simpsons - A Retort - Grant McLaughlin
Monday, October 21, 2013
The Simpsons - Next Time - Ben Rosenthal
1. The Simpson family sits on its couch looking at each other awkwardly.
CAPTION
Next time on The Simpsons!
2. Homer is asking a question, confused.
HOMER
Um, why are we just sitting here?
LISA
Because we have done everything. Ever. There is nothing left for us to do.
3. Close up of Homer, scratching his head.
HOMER
Then why are we still here?
4. A close up of Lisa.
LISA
Because for some reason we still make money. Mountains and mountains of money.
5. A close up of Marge, sobbing.
MARGE
Why won't they just let us die.
6. Same as Panel 1, but Marge is sobbing in her hands.
CAPTION
That's next time on The Simpsons.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Simpsons ended for me after 8 seasons. Everything after does not exist. That is all.
